Flyford annual cricket tour – the art of winning while not winning
Dramatis Personae:
Simon ‘Si’ Tibke – erstwhile organiser
Paul “Scritty’ Rone-Clarke
Steve ‘Bev’ Bevan
Mark ‘Walks’ Walker
Pete Holpin
Joe ‘Chappers’ Chapman - Breakfast meeting organiser
Josh Nullis – Curry Wrangler
Joe Allsopp
Steve Nullis
Alex (Eileen) Hawkes
Aaron (Monkster) Monk – Scorer
Your own correspondent
Supporting cast
The Reverand Tibke
Tracey
FRIDAY
Up front I should say this report is something of a personal reflection of the three days, and while it will contain match reports they are in some ways secondary when it comes to this tour report.
While having been on cricket club tours before, full disclosure, this was my first with the Flav, so I had little to go on in terms of what to expect. Would the organisation be any good? Will it all be left to one poor sod who does the lot for no thanks? Will there be ‘tour cliques’?
Having been with the club for just over a year I knew in my heart of hearts these were not really valid questions. Of course it would be well organised, of course others would pitch in to get things done and I am really not at all sure that anyone in the club knows what a clique is other that the sound Scritty’s back makes after three games in three days.
A word first about village cricket tours. The history of such tours recedes back into the mists of time and is passed down mainly by word of mouth. It is a noble tradition whereby a village team tired of exposing its many shortcomings to the local opposition decides to take off to distant parts to show their inadequacies in batting, bowling and fielding to players in other parts of the country. Does the village cricketer harbour the hope that by taking his skills to other parts they will be miraculously transformed?
Actually, it is probably best to discard all of the above references to cricket. Tours are not really about cricket, even a reasonably disinterested outsider can quickly work out that while the matches are the structure on which the tour is built, and that reason for going is a couple of days away with mates, beer, and banter. We all know this to be true.
So what of the class of ’24?
Firstly a word of thanks to Si. Simon did all the leg work in terms of arranging both matches and accommodation. Tours do not magically happen they have to be arranged, which is what Simon did, perfectly, in the background with no fuss and asking for no thanks. However I think I speak for all when I say those thanks are given anyway.
Running up to the Friday, anticipation had been increasing on the chat group, weather apps had been regularly checked and a day by day GIF countdown provided by Tracy. I for one felt a little of that ‘can’t wait for Christmas’ feeling I knew as a child as the days were ticked off the calendar.
Of course as time does, though refusing steadfastly to fly, it passed, and the morning of the tour eventually dawned bright, sunny and clear. Of course being English that meant that I was convinced we were in for three days unbroken sunshine, except for perhaps the odd fluffy cloud the M5 would be clear and choirs of angels would trumpet my maiden century for the club. You would think at my advanced age that sort of ridiculous optimism would have been knocked out of me.
So off I set for a 10 O’Clock breakfast meet up at a seemingly famous and widely popular farmhouse kitchen that Joe Chapman had thoughtfully organised. However, when Joe put that he had booked for 10 at the restaurant, I took that to mean O’clock and not for 10 people. Not the first time I have been early. I really don’t mind being early and I carried that through to almost every shot I played over the next 3 days.
The breakfast was just what was needed, a chance to get together, fill plates high with food that had been sitting under 40-watt bulbs for a while and crank up the expectations for the days to come.
Of course, there were those that could not attend, Pete Holpin being required at work Josh Nullis being forced by his capitalist running dog employers to attend a training course and Joe Allsopp who deems it more important to use his annual leave to go on trips to Bali with delightful young women than to be available for all you can eat breakfasts with his team mates. Take a long hard look at those priorities Joe!
So, breakfasts polished off and kit having been collected by the ever helpful Steve Nullis we all set off West, with bellies full of food and souls full of hope.
There is though one sure way to leach all joy from the soul and that is the M5 on the last Friday of the school summer holidays. While I will not labour the boring travel details I did fall into what J.R.R. Tolkien referred to as a ‘short cut to mushrooms” by trying to use my Sat Nav to plot a way around Bristol. Unfortunately, so had many others. Still, Siri served me up a delightful playlist of Soul classics that made the journey at least bearable. The vagaries of the M5 overcome, I did eventually make it to the first meeting point of the tour proper The Talbot in Uplyme. A pleasant hostelry with about a thousand steps down from the bar to the garden where Scritty and Bev were serenely enjoying their first pint having taken the sensible approach of just sticking to the M5 no matter what.
Uplyme is a lovely little village with the cricket ground within a cricket ball’s throw of the pub. The ground itself is picturesque and surrounded by mature trees. Unfortunately, the outfield itself was a little less inviting as some inconsiderate idiot dog owners had allowed their dogs to have a dump and just left it there. Luckily being a dog owner, I always have bags to hand and the offending deposits removed.
Field now cleared and stumps in place it was time to get down to the cricketing side of the tour. Toss lost Flyford bowling.
Let me state at this point that we were not playing Uplyme but a ‘pub side’ from The Talbot. At the start it appeared that we would be two well matched teams with opening bowlers Scritty and Bev restricting The Talbot to just 15 from the first 5 overs of 20. Scritty returning a parsimonious 5 runs for no wicket from his three overs and Bev weighing in with 3 overs 1 for 19.
Unfortunately, The Talbot had a couple of players a little above the ‘pub’ in ability level and after the Talbot opener had retired on 25 having taken 33 balls, the middle order set about making life difficult for the Flyford bowlers. At the 10 over point at 57 the game was still somewhat within our sights, 99 at 15 overs saw it disappearing over the horizon and at 171 for the full 20 overs it had disappeared completely.
To protect the innocent, I will not detail all the bowling figures here, but full details are in the pictures below if anyone is interested!
Batting, it is probably fair to say that Flyford faced something of an uphill struggle. It is likely that we would need a team X Ray in order to find 172 runs in us. Still, the name of the game is having fun. Having used a random generator (from which my name was omitted) we opened with Scritty and Walks. Two very capable batsmen. However although I have no wish to be an amateur psychologist my assessment is that Scritty is not temperamentally best placed as an opener and was soon back in the hutch for a blob. The usually dependable Walks following not long after for 6. However, with Bev and Simon at the wicket Flyford did manage 20 from the first 4 overs, at just over half the required run rate.
However, with the loss of Bev for what was to prove his best score on the tour of 16 and Chappers out LBW without troubling the scorer with an LBW that was so plum he walked before the umpire had raised his trigger finger, things were looking bleak.
This left your own correspondent with a previous highest score of only 11 as the next hope for the visitors. Modesty prevents me from saying other than that previous highest score is now history, the new one standing at a proud 20. However, with 5 wickets down for 99 and Simon retired unbeaten on 28, even cameos of 18 not out in 8 balls from skipper Josh and 9 from dad Steve with Pete Holpin not out 7 Flyford ended their 20 overs some 43 runs short of victory.
No matter, a freshen up and retire to the nearby Talbot where our hosts had laid on sandwiches and chips we were left to mull over the game and award the awards.
While Friday may not have seen victory on the field it ended with everyone safely checked into the hotel, and the bar found. Your correspondent, mindful of the upcoming schedule and a rapidly aging body left several of the Flyford massive to go in search of the fleshpots of Exeter. How they ended up in the local ‘Spoons I have no idea.
Awards
Man of the Match: Your own correspondent
Champagne Moment: Josh - catch
Tit: Joe Allsopp
Thanks for coming: Joe Allsopp
Saturday
The day dawned bright sunny and hopeful. We knew that our opponents were friendly and welcoming and play in the spirit of village cricket. However before that we had a morning to kill and breakfast to be found. Who knew that in Exeter you could get a very decent Ulster Fry. The more traditional part of the team, took this rout while the more adventurous sought out the more exotic offerings of Crave down at the Quay. Not sure what I can say about Aaron’s choice of Greggs when there were such delicious alternatives on offer.
So bellies filled, odd bits of kit bought and shit shirts procured it was time to set off for the delights of Chumleigh for the second game.
Chumleigh is a delightful cricket ground set high up on a hill. It is probably safe to say given the topography of the area it is the only place there could even be a cricket pitch for many miles around. It is though delightful, as are the players of Chumleigh CC. Their welcome and hospitality even extended to making the 10 man up to 11 with the loan of the redoubtable young character Will Round (12). Who, whatever he might lack in years or physical stature wants for nothing in the confidence, enthusiasm and likability department. I think we should count Will as an honorary member of Flyford Flavell CC.
With Si Tibke taking skipper duties it was decided that Flyford should bat. Somewhat unusual in my experience with playing with the club!
At 19 for 4 after 9 overs it was looking like it may be a case of booking the curry house a bit earlier. Steve Bevan 4, Si Tibke 5 and Joe Allsopp without troubling the scorer, left Flyford in a precarious position. It can only be speculated as to whether Mr Allsopp’s regular acquaintance with his friend Mr Rum and Mr Coke were contributing factors to his score.
With Walks already at the crease and with your correspondent fresh from a new high score the total was moved on to more respectable 83 before the next wicket fell. Needless to say it was not Walks that departed with a semi respectable 17 to a very good catch at point. It should be added that this total was aided and abetted by the Chumleigh wicket keeper by forgetting to run your correspondent out while going for a non existent run which Walks rightly refused to take part in.
Will Round then strode confidently to the crease, fist bumping the ‘I never fist bump’ Mark walker on the way to a dogged 5 runs. Both the Flyford total and Will’s batting reputation was somewhat helped by several no balls.
With the loss of walks for 54 with the total on 107 it was looking like Flyford might well be well short of a decent total. When Steve Nullis departed for a dogged 0 that would see him in possession of the duck hat for the rest of the tour things were not looking great. It pleases me to say though that the tail did wag a little with contributions of 5 from Chappers which included a sublime ‘nurdle’ to leg for 4, a not out 11 from Pete and a swashbuckling Baz Ball 27 from 21 balls from Scritty who looked much more comfortable down the order.
Following a very welcome tea (ah those were the days) Flyford took the field and it has to be said, enjoyed very little success. Wickets only falling to Bev 1-21 from 3 and Steve Nullis 1 for 16 from 1.5 overs. Pete Holpin was probably the best of the rest with a miserly 4 overs for just 11 runs. Scritty laboured hard for no reward and figures of 6 overs for 43 runs. Simon weighed in with 2 overs for 15 runs. Chappers might well wish to forget this one. Will Round bowled a very respectable 3 overs 1 for 13, which was, we are told his first wicket!
Ultimately Chudleigh overhauled the Flyford total with a very healthy margin of 16.1 overs and 8 wickets in hand. Oh well there was the shite shirt competition to look forward to!
Following Josh’s main contribution for the day it was revealed that Ghandi’s curry house had been booked for Nine O’clock so there was time for a drink and awards at the lovely Old Court Inn in Chudleigh before a return to the hotel, a spruce up and the main event of any tour - the Saturday night out.
Donning my (I thought) pretty awful red Hawaiian shirt (we all know red shirts are shite) I strode down confident of taking the trophy. Imagine my chagrin when having found the other in the secret garden (by following the signs) it was clear that there was considerable and stiff competition. I would refer the gentle reader to the various photographs but can assure you they were not so much a sight for sore eyes but a sight to make your eyes sore.
So off to the restaurant we troop.
While this is not a restaurant review the food at Ghandi’s was for this correspondent at least on the correct side of adequate, and the beer wine and other beverages flowed freely and the staff were super attentive (they wanted us out by 10.30). It was at the restaurant that Tracey along with Alex, having joined us fresh from donkey rescuing, was given the honour of judging the shite shirt competition. While Alex and Simon had effectively ruled themselves out with identical shirts and Josh was quietly confident with the ‘Pirate Cat” Tracy remained tight lipped until after the bill was settled and the restaurant cleared.
Absent a drum roll Tracy announced that the winner was Chappers given that not only was it a shite design, but the material was awful as well. Props Mr Chapman.
It will need others to fill in the rest of the evening as after only one drink at the after curry pub my legs were asking politely what I thought I was doing. Mr John Daniels quietened the questions for a while but when Pete said he was heading back that was my excuse to leave the field to the youngsters.
It has come to my attention though that several of the party did not return to the hotel until 3 a.m. A time that these days I only know exists when I wake in need of relief.
Awards
Man of the Match: Walks - 54 great catch
Champagne Moment: Chappers - Leg Glance
Tit: Your own correspondent calling a run that never was
Thanks for coming: Josh Nullis run out 1 did not bowl. Real thanks to Will Round
SUNDAY
Sunday dawned less hopefully. The sky grey and the forecast uncertain. A larger group had defected to the Crave faction for a splendid breakfast and some did not make an appearance for breakfast at all. A word here for the redoubtable Mr Allsopp, who, though his prodigious consumption of hard spirts was legendary, never failed to miss a roll call.
On to the final match. We were due to play Wednesday on Sunday in Chudleigh. On arrival at the ground two matters became worryingly apparent. Firstly, it was a big ground, a very big ground, secondly our opponents combined ages would not amount to that of your correspondent. What is more, one of them told me that they were a cricket club formed from a football team, so they were all pretty much fit as butcher’s dogs. A word too about their attire. Call me a bluff old traditionalist but cricket is played in whites but it seems these young whippersnappers prefer yellow and black shirts and black shorts. What is the world coming to? Answers on a post card to Col. Bufton-Tufton of Tunbridge Wells please.
On the plus side they were a thoroughly nice bunch of guys who were playing for the sheer joy of the game. The toss lost by skipper for the day Pete, it was decided we were batting. In a very un-Flyford like way, we started off at both a good scoring lick and held on to our wickets. The score had progressed to respectable 37 from 6 overs before Josh was bowled for 15. Unfortunately, the situation got considerably worse a few minutes later when Bev was run out for 1 when Joe A. called for an imaginary second run. Had the dark cloud above Bev as he walked off been extended to the skies above we would certainly have had to come off for bad light.
The score was made worse by the fact that Joe himself was soon dismissed for a tour highest score of 19. Your correspondent scratched around for a while for 9 runs and Steve Nullis confirmed his ownership of the duck hat. Mark Walker did as he usually does and again was the highest scorer with 45 not out.
Other contributions were Alex with a commendable 2, Simon with 5, Scritty with a clubbed 4, Chappers with 3 and Pete not out 1. It should be noted that Pete carried his bat all weekend and never lost his wicket.
At the end of the 35 overs the Flyford total was 156 much helped by the top scoring Mr Extras with 52. Possibly enough, possibly not.
A word here for the entertainment value of the Wednesday lads. Their banter in the field was superb. None of it aimed at the batsmen rather at their own teammates. Clearly they know and like each other a great deal. It is a phenomenon that can only been seen within a group that like and respect each other that zingers can be flung about with absolutely no trace of malice.
So Flyford took the field. It must be said at this point my legs were no longer asking polite question but screaming at me with things like ‘what do you think you are doing three games in 3 days?’ However, I chose to ignore them and soldiered on for the good of the team.
It soon became apparent that they had at least a few players who though new to the team were not new to the game and knew which end of the bat to hold. Not least the opening bat who got 53 before retiring and sent the ball to all parts of the ground.
All I can really say about the Flyford bowling and fielding effort that it was approached with the same vim and vigour and give it all you have got as ever. Joe Allsopp doing a sterling job on the boundary despite fervently wishing to be elsewhere and knowing that he was racking up ‘Tit’ nominations almost by the minute.
The bowling story is only of one man. The (metaphorically) towering figure of Steve Bevan put all other efforts in the shade with a memorable 5 for 42 from 7 overs. A performance that had the grey beards in the club musing on the last time Flyford had seen such bowling heroics on tour. Other bowling was Chappers 5 overs for 35, Si Tibke with a very respectable 4 overs for 18, Scritty whose figures of 7 overs 1 wicket for 36 mask the truth that all but two balls were excellent. Unfortunately, those two got fully punished.
Pete Holpin again weighed in with an accurate and miserly 5 overs one maiden for just 14 runs.
While there were times in the middle of the Wednesday innings hope did rise in the collective breast that victory may yet be secured such hopes were dashed when the Wednesday number 9 scored a quick 20 not out. So, the game was lost by 2 wickets. In truth a margin much narrower than was feared at the outset.
Awards
Man of the Match: Steve Bevan
Champagne Moment: Si Tibke great catch
Tit: Joe Allsopp too many to list
Thanks for coming: Extras!
Honourable mentions:
To the Reverend Tibke, who sat uncomplaining through all three games, it can only be assumed sir that through faith you find strength.
To Aaron ‘The Monkster’ Monk who though hampered by injury was still very much part of the tour and did a sterling job scoring for all three games. Though thankfully the coloured pens only lasted one game.
Finally to Tracy and Alex for making the trip down and taking part in the tour. The more the merrier.
Reflections:
So Flyford 2024 Devon Tour was ultimately fruitless when looked at purely from the balance sheet of winning and losing. So what? While it has been said before we all play to win the truth is we play for more than that. To be part of something bigger, something more than a mere result in a scorebook (or who knows perhaps one day a tablet).
My experience is of a bunch of friends some of which have known each other for decades but are willing to welcome newcomers with open arms. It is about everyone doing the best they can whatever level that is. About knowing you will get more grief for not trying than you ever will for trying and failing.
It was a brilliant weekend, I have nothing to compare it with in Flyford terms but can say it considerably exceeded expectations in terms of enjoyment quotient and though my legs are still muttering at me with epithets not suitable for publication I can honestly say if someone announced a similar tour next weekend I would be there. As it is I will have to make do with a trip to Clent!
